Woodcock as ifhe were a girl like the others, but he supposed that by wearing agirl's bathing suit he was inviting himself to be referred to as agirl. Ms. Woodcock led the girls in a series of aerobic exercises asthey stood in the pool. The movements were uncomplicated and Jock hadan easy enough time following along. In past classes he had watchedfrom afar and so the movements were somewhat familiar to him. Afterthe aerobics they began doing water ballet and the movements becamemore complicated and Jock had to imitate what the girls in front ofhim were doing. As he did so, Ms. Woodcock called out, "Good,Jocelyne," or "Jocelyne, more gracefully. Let your inner girl out.Move your arms gracefully. You have girl arms so allow them to be girlarms. Yes, Jocelyne. That's better. In this dance all the girls arefeeling pretty as they get ready for a big date. Good girls, you'reall doing so well."Midway through the dance, it started clicking for Jock and he felt atease moving his arms and. How does any one person get to be so smart?Oh, that’s right.She graduated from UGA, and was never a Marine!Yes, I cried some. Maybe more than some.Things that I thought were far behind me weren’t.They had just moved from one side to the other, waiting for the right situation to come out again.Sam, there is no other way to describe it, but I was really “fucked up.”And thought I was doing such a good job of adjusting to it.I even remember telling you once that I had had an additional year to get over my grief, and was wondering if I was being fair to you.You are so far in front of me I only hope you will continue to wait for me.Please, wait for me Sam? Please?Dr. Andrews was a little upset with me for sending you the photos.And no, she did not see them, I just told her about them.After today’s session, and with my understanding more about myself, I know why she was a little upset.But I still hope they drive you CRAZY!I also understand what she meant about being careful with, as you.
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